Did God really say no sex before marriage? How far is too far? If we love each other, why does marriage matter? These are the questions Christian women ask me regarding sex and relationships. The church uses the blanket statement of abstinence to address sexual purity, and Christian women are left running to secular sources for answers to their questions. Let’s change that.
Let’s dig into the hard stuff, friends, starting with the ultimate question “Did God really say no sex before marriage?” And we’ll go from here. Grab your bible or your smartphone and open to Genesis chapter three. Now, I highly encourage you to read this entire chapter on The Fall before you move on: Read Genesis 3:1-14.
Check it out—Satan asks, “Did God really say…?” In Genesis 3:1. The serpent is crafty. He wanted Eve to focus on the one thing she couldn’t have. Satan transformed the human’s view of God away from a loving Father and into a rule giver. You see, Satan wanted Eve to focus on the rule and forget the reason. And he wants you to do the same; we must be on guard.
In Genesis 3:5, the serpent temps Adam and Eve with what they already have: being like God. They are made in the image of God (Genesis 1:27), as are you. It may be easy to brush this whole sex thing under the rug because of our culture, but I can assure you, your soul is too important to give away to that fraternity boy who will forget your name tomorrow. You’re worth more than that.
Understand, God doesn’t tell you to save sex for marriage just to give you another rule to blindly follow. God lays this out in scripture as a lifestyle to emulate because He loves and protects his children. When we have sex with someone, our soul is tied to theirs… forever. So, does God really say no sex before marriage? Yes. God tells us that two become one (Ephesians 5:31), the tie between husband and wife is unbreakable by man (Mark 10: 7-9), and that ungodly sexual relations fragment the soul (1 Corinthians 6:16). God doesn’t say love means it’s okay to have sex; He says marriage means sex is a beautiful thing.
Your loving Father desires to protect you. His desire is for you, all of you. Instead of asking: how far is too far? Ask: where is my heart? Am I honoring God?
- Christian Cosmo: The Sex Talk You Never Had by Phylicia Masonheimer
- Uniquely Women Podcast with Phylicia Masonheimer & Lisa Hensley
- Authentic Intimacy
- Sex and the Single Girl by Dr. Juli Slattery